weekly update:::

this has really been the best week ever.
though dealing with hormones and conflicting emotions--
depressed one minute, happy the next...
headaches and nasty tasting medication-
hugs [i like hugs]
chest pains though..i think my heart exploded
let me pick up the pieces

<X3 blah

hormones and #2's basement

oh dear god...how i remember how much i longed for these days...
so yeah..nicole calls me yesterday at 11am while i was sleeping, so i call her back, and shes like all crack-ish and blithers "HEY! DO YOU WANNA COME TO MY HOUSE?! DO YA??"
talkings of freak memory lane and some lasagna later, went to the grocery store.
car screams "FUCK THE DINOSAUR!" as we terrorize the shoppers.
mall for like 10 minutes..jacks mannequin...kiss it!
post office..random man with acoustic guitar...erotic city paper...
return home..then travels to #2's basement.
out of control hormones, injuries, hugs...touchy feelies...
hes such a nice kid. [[smile]]
too much to really put in there because yeah...we were all whores in the basement!
WOOOO!
passed out on the floor and played animal crossing--headaches!
#2 offered pain killers...so nice..though i declined because im defective and cant swallow pills.
the weather is bi-polar...[[wizard of oz music]]
he wont have to bleed out his eyeball.
shook is coming over today..IM NOT GETTING DRESSED.
shower...no...i hav no need to impress.

<X3 another lovely weekend
                                          lets get naked!

emergency room at 6 pm

woke up yesterday for my ortho appointment- bad stomach pains.
got through the appt, and nearly threw up..had to pull over at arby's.
really sick..dad took me home.
the pain turned into paralysis, I couldn't move.
Then I threw up so much that mom hauled my ass to the doctor's.
Threw up in the doctors bathroom...they said it was appendicitis..and may require emergency surgery.
screamed...cried...hyperventilated....
EMERGENCY ROOM ::: WHEELING HOSPITAL.
then pain just...stopped....
Got changed into that hidious hospital get-up [[whatever fashion impaired moron that decorated that sad excuse for clothing should be shot.]]..
bloodwork...cried....IV in my arm...cried...it started sucking blood out of me--
lots of tears going on.
x-rays...chilly being half naked and wheeled around.
ultrasound..drank until I nearly peed myself and there was gel and I was being touched inappropriately but she was a doctor...
ugh god the pain got worse...
turns out no appendicitus.
no emergency surgery.
too many tears.
sommer was really there for me though..it was so nice..i really couldn't have been happier.
ive had a horrible past 2 days.
felt like shooting myself..but i'll be okay.
got my glasses, i can see, havent puked yet today but im still pretty sick--
but im hauling my ass to school tomorrow because we've got that concert.
i hear haines is spaztic.
EWW.
no one loves a spaztic haines.

<X3 im still alive!

headlines

Mall yesterday.
Duck whistle trio.
I think I laughed so hard..I felt my kidney burst.
Bought a shirt..all ninja-ish..
Left kinda early with my Mom and sister and traveled to South Hills.
Whooppee!!!
I bought a shirt with a printed tie on it to make up for the one that was left on clearance at Hot Topic that I never got around to buying before school started.
But, mine is cooler.
dELiA's, $4.
I used my card....ohh yeaaahhh...
Went upstairs to the Hot Topic and bought that Crab Scrambly shirt I was bent out of shape that Megan Bails bought the day after I saw it..but she never wears it...and I appreciate Crab Scrambly.
Plus, it was 8 bucks like the ninja shirt.
Amen for clearance!
Good to spend time with the pals this weekend.

Nicole: WHO IS THAT?!

Make it obvious...please....

<X3

people are mean

New classes today.
Eww.
Meg's in my gym class, one of the few people that I know [[hooray!]]
I significantly hate the human race.
Sommer basically said that she hates it how I don't match everyday and that it bothers her, while clearly biting her tongue from saying:
"You look like shit and you "wonder why peoople look at you funny."
Pardon me for not wanting to meet the requirements of the public eye.
I don't care if I don't cake on my makeup and hide my face with hair.
I don't care that my eyes are bloodshot and there's nothing I can do about it.
I don't care if I'm not cool because I don't use boys as insecurity devices.
I don't need to know if you think I'm crazy because I have a meaning to life.
I don't care that no guy has said I'm beautiful and has ever meant it.
Because, you know why?
I am beautiful.

save me too.....